Family Ideal

We change and grow together or we change and grow apart. The latter is not an option. Failure is not expected. We strive for success. We choose to embrace one another and if one of us needs to embark on a new adventure then we all unite and move forward in the direction that beckons one of us to go. Change may shape us differently but we will never allow it to set asunder what we represent. Although we are individuals, differing in many profound ways, our differences do not separate us; they complement who we are as a whole making us stronger together. We each fly out in the direction that enchants our hearts but are always able to return and find solace in our home. Our uniqueness adds meaning to us. It is the essence of who we are. There is a special power in being able to come together to make a unified whole. We support and guide each other, give and take, atone and forgive, accept and acknowledge, love and cherish. We are a family.

I did the above free writing because my little writing angel or angels have been in my ear about the topic of family. I know I’m supposed to write when certain lines go through my mind non-stop until I put pen to paper then all is quiet again. Sometimes the lines go faster than I can type but since they are always repeated I eventually catch up. I stopped and looked at what I had written and hoped to include this idea of what a family could be into my life when I choose to begin my own family. Everyone knows there is no such thing as a perfect family but I have seen some families that come close to the ideal I have free written about. There are families that no matter their differences, or mistakes, or transgressions, they can always find a way to support and love one another. In their family ideal, their resolute is that love does conquer all. During the holidays, when families convene together, some families assemble in peace and other families come together under an umbrella of stress. When family tension arises, it is hard to be thankful for them in same moment you would rather not know them. I can certainly identify with this but I do my best to remember why I need to stay positive. I tell myself I may not be able to see them next year for whatever reason or I can remember to present compassion because I know they are still growing and have much to learn. Basically, I try to take the high road simply because I know I can. My family is not perfect and passing judgment seems to be easier for them than dispensing love however I still love and accept my family as they are. They are their own people and I am mine. When all is said in done, when a crisis arrives, everyone forgoes their egos and bands together to conquer whatever has attacked us. This is a familial strength I admire about us.

There are also those who do not have families, at least of the biological kind. And honestly, family consists of whomever you invite into your life with love. It is who you surround yourself with in good and bad times. Some families consist of friends, neighbors, and colleagues. I definitely have friends I consider to be a part of my family. These people can be considered more precious simply because they are freely chosen and not biologically destined. Family can also include pets and places. Just as there are a variety of ways to translate the word family, there are even numerous more ways to translate its meaning. I have a family ideal in my mind which resonates well for me and each person has to ascertain what will work best for them. It is also worthwhile to note that the family ideal does not begin with everyone; it begins with one.

Embrace your family today and reach out to anyone who may be spending today alone. Merry Christmas!

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